From the Desk of Doctor B. D. Septive
The Most Self-Helpiest of all Self-Help Gurus
Look at the charred and smoldering remains of your two-story condo. I know it must be difficult, but think of all the miracles that took place during that flaming particle board barbecue. The most obvious miracle was that none of your pets were inside. That’s because you never had any pets and each one of them is sincerely thankful. Your refrigerator contained no desserts and none of your clothes were worth saving, except the new pair of pleated trousers with the horse tail. Think of what a blessing it is that your home burned down when it did. The value had just dropped way below what you had it insured for and the new assessment from the county isn’t due for another five months. With your newly acquired windfall you can buy a much nicer condo, lots of smooth, creamy desserts, and all the horse tail pants your new super walk-in closet can hold.
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